Alton Towers Lyrics

Staggered in Macdonalds on a Friday afternoon, All the pubs were shut, There were knob all else fer do. I said, "Gissus a Big Mac now you spotty little twat." He said, "Have a nice...Read Full Lyrics

One day after closing I was lying on me nest,When Stez shouts "get yer bags on, come on outside."So I grabbed me stripy tank-top, I 'ad beer stains on me vest,An' I said "best get ...Read Full Lyrics

He squidges in the van, All twenty four stones, He gets three kebabs and he eats them on his own, Quick trouser cough Nevis touches cloth, Fuck fuck hide behind a truck, all the wi...Read Full Lyrics

Get at 'em. There was a load bloody faries, In Buenos bloody Aries, With greasy hair and sweaty bums, They'd never heard of Bonningtons, It were a different culture and a different...Read Full Lyrics

Yaaaaaaaaaw! Dick Head was a pratt, he drove a Skoda with extra lamps on, Always dickin' prattin', Looked like a reuseable tampon. Tried to chat the birds up, He'd always end up bl...Read Full Lyrics

We had a foreign holiday in Tiermarbelly, We're gonna get laid by some greasy fellas, We want some lump that's gonna fer plate us, And we're gettin' under some Itallian waiters, Dr...Read Full Lyrics

Well you ain't been goin' down the pub, You ain't been playing darts, You ain't been doin' what you should, You've been hangin' out with yer tart. You've got fer get some Boddies d...Read Full Lyrics

I walked into the Nag's Head for to sustinate me belly, There was a fit crack in the corner but I knew her cunt was smelly, She smelt of rotting fish heads and old and crispy sick,...Read Full Lyrics

We all went down New Delih, We had too much curry and aching bellies. Peter got gut rot and puked on the floor, Stez Styx banging on shithouse door. I says, come on lads and finish...Read Full Lyrics

A ya ya ya ya ya yaaar... No petrol in the van, Knee deep in empty cans, We've lost the map, the tyre's flat, the bloody kid's been banned, We stopped off for some grease, Nevis is...Read Full Lyrics