I stayed off work today Lyrics

Through the bars of a large enclosureThe village ladies intently stared,Where a gorilla with massive composureWas impassively combing his hair.They were shamelessly interested,Eyei...Read Full Lyrics

I am a handsome policeman. I am bold and versatile.My wife is white and beautiful, with breasts of alabaster.When I hurry home to her, she whispers with a smile,'What did you do to...Read Full Lyrics

'Tell me if you've heard the one,The one about the Jew boy.This one is a gasser!It's just a bit of fun and they don't really mind.And if you are a Jew boy,This will really slay you...Read Full Lyrics

There was a man who when he won stuffon the stalls in village fairswould always choose the tortoisenot the goldfish, not the teddy bearsHe'd always answer when they asked himwhat h...Read Full Lyrics

It was a grand upstanding bantam cock,So brisk and stiff and spry,With springy step and jaunty plumeAnd a purposeful look in his eye,In his little black blinking eye, he had.I took...Read Full Lyrics

The ladies of the neighbourhood are fighting the fight for womanhoodby taking what they feel to be fundamental libertiesThe sufferagettes are at it againwith a low and underhand st...Read Full Lyrics

Think I’m proud to be your enemyTake your hands off of meYou’re worse than the thing that possessed meThey way they wereThe way they should have beenAnnalisaAnnalisa was 15 yea...Read Full Lyrics

How do I begin trying to explain Everything I feel, so delicately paved We are only human, we all make our mistakes Yet you were always there to tell me it would be OK Oh you're e...Read Full Lyrics

Oh dear, look what you've done You've made a mess of me and I don't want to clean up I'm dangerously high You've seemed to quench my appetite I want to drink you sober I want to f...Read Full Lyrics

Take a moment to decide What is wrong, what is right Let's celebrate the art of dreaming Are you naughty, are you nice What would you sacrifice, for exactly what it is you needed ...Read Full Lyrics