The Christmas Story Lyrics

Oh, Holy Crap! I think I got a flat tire And I'm in the middle of A Puerto Rican neighborhood!...Read Full Lyrics

Last Christmas I went up in niceville, for a little vacation,and ah, boy I love Shania Twain, boy I tell you what,she makes me hornier than a retard watchin' baywatch, but anyway I...Read Full Lyrics

O little girl from Birmingham, how good you look in jeans. I'd love to take you on a date, but your teeth are so damn green....Read Full Lyrics

Blue Balls Blue balls Its dollar night at the titty-club See Them Dance On My Pants Soon it will be Bathroom Time...Read Full Lyrics

The first queer santy clause Wore red leather chaps With a pair of white shorty shorts that had a hole in the butt crack...Read Full Lyrics

Good lord my dads a ginacolagist and he can't drive no more he got tunnle vision that's funny that ain't very christmasy but that's funny. Santy Claus, Santy Claus up in the air de...Read Full Lyrics

I PISSED MY PANTS THE TOILET WAS JUST TO FAR I DRUNK TOO MUCH DAMN BEER I TRIED TO HOLD IT IN BUT MY BLADDER JUST GAVE IN AND I PISSED RIGHT THROUGH MY DRAWERS RIGHT THROUGH MY WR...Read Full Lyrics

This is the story of the first Thanksgiving, once again by my drunk grandpa: Many years ago...Christopher Columbus and his pilgrim buddies come to America on a boat called the May...Read Full Lyrics

On the first day of christmas, my true love gave to me, klap and I left her...Read Full Lyrics

Call the doctor Earl is bleeding Tried to pet my pit bull Sam That stupid Moron he knows better Now he's in the doctors office And he ain't got no fricken hands....Read Full Lyrics