Beginning French Lyrics

During the newspaper strike, the networks asked the writers to read their columns on TV. The writers weren’t actors, they did all the wrong things they squinted into the ... ligh...Read Full Lyrics

I had this dream ... and in it my mother was sitting there cutting out pictures of hamsters from magazines. In some of the pictures, the hamsters are pets, and in some of them, ham...Read Full Lyrics

I dreamed that I was Jimmy Carter’s lover, and I was somewhere, I guess in the White House ... and there were lots of other women there, too ... and they were supposed to be his ...Read Full Lyrics

I wanted you ... and I was looking for you ... but I couldn’t find you ....I wanted you. And I was looking for you all day. But I couldn’t find you. I couldn’t find you.Youâ€...Read Full Lyrics

My sister and I used to play this game called Red Hot.And in Red Hot, the ceiling is suddenly about a thousand degrees.And there’s no gravity.Gravity doesn’t exist anymore.And ...Read Full Lyrics

William F. Buckley, Jr., Mr. Private Property, planned to give a little talk, a political speech, in a small town in Illinois. His advance men discovered that the center of town ha...Read Full Lyrics

I have this recurring nightmare, and that is that everyone in the world, except myself, has the problems of babies.I mean they’re normal height and everything--five feet, six fee...Read Full Lyrics

Good evening. Welcome to Difficult Listening Hour. The spot on your dial for that relentless and impenetrable sound of Difficult Music (Music). So sit bolt upright in that straight...Read Full Lyrics

There are ten million stories in the Naked City. But no one can remember which one is theirs....Read Full Lyrics

During WWII, the Russians were testing their parachutes. Sometimes they didn’t open at all and a lot of troops were lost this way. During the invasion of Finland, hundreds of tro...Read Full Lyrics