Here's To The Crabgrass Lyrics

Holiday For States There are songs about Montana, And New York and Indiana, But the song the nation patiently awaits Is the song I now will bring you, As I clear my throat and sing...Read Full Lyrics

Hey, there are a lot of Californians here, are there not? (Yeah!) Are you familiar with where I live near Los Angeles, Van Nuys? (Yes.) Well, do you happen to know how Van Nuys...Read Full Lyrics

Hungarian Goulash No. 5 If you like Hungarian food, They have a goulash which is very good. Or if you wish a dish that's Chinese, Somewhere down in Column B there's lobster Cantone...Read Full Lyrics

I Can't Dance I can't dance. I can't dance. Besides, I'm two feet shorter than the girls are. All these dancing parties are just plain dumb. When they asked, I should have said, "I...Read Full Lyrics

I See Bones The doctor was looking at the X-ray And I asked him, "What do you see?" And he kept on looking at the X-ray As he said in French to me: "I see bones. I see gizzards and...Read Full Lyrics

If I could play the piano Like I'd like to play the piano, I would sit down at the piano, And I'd play. That's how I'd play the piano night and day. If I could play the banj...Read Full Lyrics

Oh, New York is changing. Wherever you look, Big tall buildings by Tishman Tishman, ahh... If I were a Tishman, Yum di diddle didle doody didle diddy didy di (Yum di didle) ...Read Full Lyrics

I was in World War II. (Hooray!) I don't know what...thank you very much. I was not gonna take credit for the entire victory, folks, but...certainly now that you've recognized th...Read Full Lyrics

Hail To Thee, Fat Person I would like to explain how it came to pass that I got fat. Ladies and gentlemen, I got fat as a public service. When I was a child, my mother said to me, ...Read Full Lyrics

It's a most unusual play; Feel like throwing my tickets away, 'Cause the boy gets the boy And the girl gets the girl And it's way too far off Broadway. It's a most unusual plo...Read Full Lyrics