If I Could Lyrics

almost every other day, well i wake up and i think, i'm so happy my school days are done. although many years have passed, oh the memories they'll last and they will haunt me 'till...Read Full Lyrics

Down in the south, there’s a road.A road haunted by racists of all ages.A road filled with teeny-boppers for Christ’s nipples.Yet, this road is saved from stereotyping obscurit...Read Full Lyrics

He drives a flatbed truck,It’s all he ever talks about.Never about the romance of the bite of fresh prey.Always, his big truck.Who knew vampires had to make up for having small g...Read Full Lyrics

Wipe that smile off your face, get back to work!I’m not paying you to sit around and listen to this!The president of Naked Caveman will be here within the hour!I want to impress ...Read Full Lyrics

Too lazy to hold a phone to your ear,You want everything about you to be heard.All you’re blubbering,All you’re whining.Let’s all listen in, as you demean your spouse.Wait, w...Read Full Lyrics

(ice cream truck jingle)This is my street!(Chris goes crazy on drums)No, this is my street!...Read Full Lyrics

Looking in the mirror,Blinding myself with orange,I hold the ultimate weapon.Standing on the porch,With my wiffle bat,I declare open season.From across the street comes an ancient ...Read Full Lyrics

Pool cue through your eye piercing your cornea,Stabbing through your grey matter,Out the back of your skull.Getting you stuck to the grill of a mach truck,Driving straight for a co...Read Full Lyrics

Non ancora parlo tedesco!...Read Full Lyrics

Everyone needs a favorite food,Unfortunately yetis are separated indefinitely from theirs.Thankfully, every ten years,We spend hard earned, placed in stripper’s underwear,Governm...Read Full Lyrics