Obey The Beard Lyrics

Your pubes are on the soap cuz you never wash em off and I never say a thing There's wrappers on the floor and you never do the dishes and I never say a thing Well... I'll move yo...Read Full Lyrics

Tearin' down the road doin' ninety In my tiny little Volkswagen on my way to Get a tank of gas I passed a cop with a radar gun waitin' for a Sucker like me to drive by goin' way to...Read Full Lyrics

All hail President Rhino All hail rhinoceros commander-in-cheif Republicans think they got a solid economic platform Rhinoceros has two horns Democrats want to raise the tax on th...Read Full Lyrics

I'm depressed So I wrote this song To express Everything that's wrong Like my mother Wouldn't let me go to a rated are Cool movie At the theater with my friends And I know That y...Read Full Lyrics

I'm being watched by a duck And with a little bit of luck I can move away and never fear again I saw his beak he made a smirk Then he dunked his head to lurk And turned my blood to...Read Full Lyrics

In a crowd With no escape Is when I feel My privates wake! Got to find Some privacy Or they will see Me scratching me! [Chorus:] My balls itch! They're itching, I gotta scratch '...Read Full Lyrics

My red nose the cause of all laughter Around here I am just a goddamn chaffeur Fucking Santa he's laughing he won't do a thing Choke on blood when you sing [Chorus:] My name is Ru...Read Full Lyrics

"For all you out there, who are dirty and weary. For all those out there, Smelling stinky and sour. For all you out there, who are in need of cleansing. I hope you're prepared, cau...Read Full Lyrics

Oh, I get it You wanna run my life! Why don't you stick an antenna up my ass And make me your own satellite You bitch Why the hell you gotta make it so damn tough I could find a ...Read Full Lyrics

My car is a PIECE OF SHIT! Wanna drive you off a cliff Watch you crash into a ravine For the things you did to me, you... STUPID CAR! I wanna make myself a pipe bomb Blow your dam...Read Full Lyrics