Last Christmas I went up in niceville, for a little vacation, and ah, boy I love Shania Twain, boy I tell you what, she makes me hornier than a retard watchin' baywatch, but anyway...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
Call the doctor
Earl is bleeding
Tried to pet my pit bull Sam
That stupid Moron he knows better
Now he's in the doctors office
And he ain't got no fricken hands....Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
Donny the Retard
Had a 8 pound water head
He was 5 foot 3
And he said to me
"i like tater tots".
"i like tater tots"
May be changed to
"my name's Donny"
Its actually "I like B...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
You better watch out,
I think she's a guy,
I'm not quite sure,
But somethin ain't right...
Hilary Clinton's Coming to town...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
This is the story of the first Thanksgiving, once again by my drunk grandpa:
Many years ago... Christopher Columbus and his pilgrim buddies come to America on a boat called the Ma...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
Get a Job
You Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum
Money don't grow on trees
You Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
I pissed my pants
The toilet was just to far
I drunk too much damn beer
I tried to hold it in
But my bladder just gave in
And I pissed right through my drawers
Right through my wra...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
O little girl from Birmingham, how good you look in jeans. I'd love to take you on a date, but your teeth are so damn green....Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
I wish my mother-in-law'd get hit by a car
I wish my mother-in-law'd get hit by a car
I wish my mother-in-law'd get hit by a car
So I wouldn't have to listen to her.... Bitch...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy
On the first night in the titty club,
We was checking out all the chicks.
There was black ones and whites ones, brunettes and blondes,
Look at the size of that red heads tits.
The ...Read Full Lyrics
Artist - Larry The Cable Guy